Nutella is not an acceptable alternative to Marmite
We bought postcards, wandered down the pier, Megan investigated an old bead shop (now sadly closed), I taught Genevieve and James about weathervanes, we discussed about how having ice cream that early in the morning would be a bad idea, and we threw stones into the sea. It was a very busy 45 minutes.
The ice cream van wouldn’t take breakfast reservations
We got to the beach so early that we arrived before the ice cream van had even appeared! For future reference, the ice cream van arrives at 10:20am. Ice cream for breakfast is therefore not an option.
Outsmarting a tree with a broom
On the theme of inappropriate geology, James found a stone with boobs. He was beside himself with glee at his discovery.
“Unicorn” is definitely not an ice cream flavour
Megan got the upper hand when it came to spotting animals though. As we got close to Blackgang Chine it transpired that one of the local residents had got hold of a retired model. “Look – it’s a velociraptor” she shouted. Brilliant!
Look at that giant narwhal!
I was all ready to start eating my breakfast when it got “stolen” by Genevieve who is now a firm lover of fried eggs in toast. She’s a cheeky little monkey, but how could I say no?
What’s the optimal length for a sandcastle moat?
We’d decided ahead of time that it was going to be a paddling day, but we instantly regretted that decision when we saw how calm and shallow the water was. Genevieve resolved the issue by stripping off and running around naked. Brilliant!
Blackberry bribery
The blackberries proved to be a constant source of bribery and bartering for good behaviour. It kept Megan entertained too – she simply loves picking blackberries and was often trailing far behind the rest of us while foraging for more.
Orpington to the Isle of Wight (via Southampton for a toilet stop)
James was fascinated by the sea again (despite having spent the previous couple of hours stood right next to it). He seemed determined to try and fall in – what a silly billy!
Holiday clubs are the best
They kids hijacked Megan’s phone and recorded a series of video selfies. We only discovered this when the videos synced to our online photo storage. The cheeky little imps! They were very cute though.
Welcome to the international slide dismounting championships
After dinner it should have been calm play time, but instead the kids were riding each other around the room like horses. Standard behaviour – I’m not sure what else we should have expected really.
A tiger, lion, monkey, dinosaur, penguin and caterpillar walked into a bar
James wanted to play golf and raided the shed for the clubs and balls. He also found a number of hula-hoops that seemed to form the holes that he was putting into (making a hole in one much more likely).
Yeti on lockdown
James was feeling particularly brave today. With lots of encouragement from Genevieve, he finally took on the big green slide all by himself. And surprise, surprise… he absolutely loved it!
School’s out for summer
James needed a wee but had managed to convince himself that there were ants down the toilet. Grandad Stephen persuaded him that he was safe from toilet-based creepy crawlies, so James managed to go in the end.
My sous-chef was in tears (but that was only due to the onions)
Genevieve was keen to help make the homemade burgers for dinner. That was until she started complaining about how much the onions hurt her eyes. I wouldn’t have minded but that was literally the first ingredient that went in to the mix!
A point-blank blast of bubbles to the face
Ahead of Genevieve’s return, I ran a bath with an abundance of bubbles. You can’t have a bath unless it’s full to the brim with bubbles! Megan took this as an opportunity to start being silly resulting in a bubble fight between her and Genevieve.
Shhhhh – step six is super secret
Genevieve’s Beaver leader had asked if she’d be up for running an activity. Normally they’d wait for a Beaver to be a bit older before doing this, but apparently Genevieve’s more than confident and capable to take it on. Brilliant!
Sunday is double-pizza day
Genevieve wanted to draw a lion with Stephen. He’ll freely admit that art is not his strong point, so he suggested that she pose for a photo and then use that as inspiration for her lion’s face. The outcome was, frankly, terrifying. Roar!
Family-friendly board games inevitably lead to arguments
James has become a bit obsessed with tennis recently (as well as table tennis which he calls “tabletop tennis” – adorable). Stephen dutifully started playing with him but couldn’t follow the rules.
If in doubt, order more cannons
Genevieve and James immediately spotted some mushrooms that had popped up around the pond. This caused quite a lot of excitement but, once it was explained that they were probably poisonous and that eating them would result in a hospital visit, the shine rubbed off the idea of picking them for dinner.
Once all the bubbles are popped, does bubble wrap just become wrap?
Our bubble of happiness was abruptly burst by Genevieve and, ironically, some bubble wrap. While our backs were turned, she’d sneaked in to the front room and had discovered the bubble wrap we’d left for her and James to play with together. Before we knew it, she was skipping, stomping and dancing over every inch…
Marble madness, tummy aches and magnificent golfing
James was keen to play ‘Tummy Ache’ after breakfast, and we were not sure if his request was based on him having had too much hot chocolate or on a genuine interest in playing the game!
Ladybird wrangler for hire
It transpired that James had thrown his Brown Bear teddy up on the washing line and it had got stuck. I’m entirely unclean on how he thought he’d get the bear back by waving a tiny stick at it.
A rocket held together by glue gun, paint and blind hope
We headed home and started playing James’s “Sneaky Squirrel” game. He took genuine delight when all of my acorns got blown out of the tree, but then threatened to throw a strop when the same thing happened to him. Some would call that karma young man!
Hair today, gone tomorrow
We went for a family walk around Keston Ponds. When they weren’t arguing about who was “the leader” or dangerously waving sticks near each others faces, the kids had an almighty time scrambling up and down the muddy banks.
Is COVID more or less infectious on the prime meridian?
Greenwich turned out to be totally fine, but some of the high streets we passed on the way there looked hellish. Chislehurst and Blackheath in particular were utterly rammed and there were very few masks to be seen. This is how we’ll end up with a second wave – be sensible people!
Our four-year-old would do very well working for Subway
The children asked if they could go in the garden and specifically requested to play musical instruments. Typically, and having a box full of musical instruments to choose from, both Genevieve and James chose the loudest recorders available and paraded around the garden as though they were the Pied Piper being followed by a hoard…
Whoa, that’s a full rainbow. All the way. Double rainbow.
After dinner, we started getting the kids ready for bed but were rudely interrupted when Stephen noticed a giant, sky-spanning double rainbow. The mere mention of a rainbow had the kids glued to the window within seconds.
Ice cream in the rain – a classic British summer’s day
In spite of the earlier rain, we heard the ice-cream van somewhere close. We couldn’t pinpoint exactly where it was coming from, so Genevieve and I jumped in the car and went to find it. Thankfully it turned out to only be around the corner and so we both indulged!
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